It's a shame this never made the cut for Tha Carter III. Joe Budden's repped.
Wednesday, 11 February 2009
Monday, 9 February 2009
La Factoria
I was just sixteen in the summer of 2002, a summer I spent in Colombia, and this was by far my favourite tune of that time:
Car Crash TV
The Max Power subculture is one I find really interesting. Not in a "I really want to spend my weekends in a rainy carpark outside Milton Keynes checking out the UV lighting under Daz's Citroen CV's fiberglass fender" way, more in a "why do you guys give a fuck?" sort of a way. Having said that, the 'Pimp My Ride' scene in Brazil is spectacularly fabulous. It still centres around (predominantly) guys meeting up in car parks and whoring out their cars like €10 Reepabahn harlots, except for the fact that these car parks are in the tropics and thus 1 million times better than those in shitty invented towns in nondescript Bucks. Oh, and the fact that their cars are docking bays for the most INSANE sound systems in the entire world.
I first stumbled upon this little beauty and thought, that's quit fat, especially when the bass kicks in.
It didn't take me long though, to chance upon these absolute monsters.
The thing is, these are just the beginning. Just click on the related videos to the right of either of the above and you will see how big these bad boys get. The weird thing is though, that rather than these nuts sound systems bringing the party, it seems in reality they are the party. No one is dancing or enjoying the sonic boom that these musical mammoths of questionable mobility offer. Instead they seem to be solely transfixed by the sheer madness of it (although the music policy doesn't seem to help - some bizarre Baile Funk/Gabber hybrid apparently). I can't really say I blame them, but I do get goosebumps just thinking about the tear up you could have with a couple of those pick ups...
I first stumbled upon this little beauty and thought, that's quit fat, especially when the bass kicks in.
It didn't take me long though, to chance upon these absolute monsters.
The thing is, these are just the beginning. Just click on the related videos to the right of either of the above and you will see how big these bad boys get. The weird thing is though, that rather than these nuts sound systems bringing the party, it seems in reality they are the party. No one is dancing or enjoying the sonic boom that these musical mammoths of questionable mobility offer. Instead they seem to be solely transfixed by the sheer madness of it (although the music policy doesn't seem to help - some bizarre Baile Funk/Gabber hybrid apparently). I can't really say I blame them, but I do get goosebumps just thinking about the tear up you could have with a couple of those pick ups...
Thursday, 5 February 2009
Welcome Back
Poor Mase. After a five year hiatus, time spent getting ordained as a preacher, he signalled his return to hip hop with this charming little ditty:
The sample is taken from the theme tune to a US 70s TV show called 'Welcome Back Kotter', (with John Travolta in it!) about a teacher who returns to his old school in order to try and impose some order on the new generation of delinquent hoodlums.
The problem for Mase is that he chose to sample a hook that had already been sampled, in my opinion more successfully, by Onyx in the 90s for their standout track, 'Slam Harder'.
I'm not sure if Onyx's choice of sample had anything to do with the subject matter of 'Welcome Back Kotter'; in their video it looks likes the sweet animated dudes and dudettes from Disney's Recess have been re-animated, 'Enchanted-style', and force-fed a strict diet of crack and crystal meth, pausing only to wash it all down with lashings of purple drank and donut the playground. So where does this leave Mase? Well, in short, thoroughly un-gangster. It certainly doesn't help having Sean Combs bigging you up half-way through the tune on a soap box in Times Square. Shit, even the 'Streetdogs' from 'Welcome Back Kotty' would turn their noses up at his LAME ghetto posturing. On the plus side, it is a nice sample, and I guess Mase had been out the game for a while at this point. Perhaps a case of if it aint broke? Oh, and I should say that I do quite dig his proto-Kanye get up, especially those boxfresh Force Ones at 0.25 seconds.
The sample is taken from the theme tune to a US 70s TV show called 'Welcome Back Kotter', (with John Travolta in it!) about a teacher who returns to his old school in order to try and impose some order on the new generation of delinquent hoodlums.
The problem for Mase is that he chose to sample a hook that had already been sampled, in my opinion more successfully, by Onyx in the 90s for their standout track, 'Slam Harder'.
I'm not sure if Onyx's choice of sample had anything to do with the subject matter of 'Welcome Back Kotter'; in their video it looks likes the sweet animated dudes and dudettes from Disney's Recess have been re-animated, 'Enchanted-style', and force-fed a strict diet of crack and crystal meth, pausing only to wash it all down with lashings of purple drank and donut the playground. So where does this leave Mase? Well, in short, thoroughly un-gangster. It certainly doesn't help having Sean Combs bigging you up half-way through the tune on a soap box in Times Square. Shit, even the 'Streetdogs' from 'Welcome Back Kotty' would turn their noses up at his LAME ghetto posturing. On the plus side, it is a nice sample, and I guess Mase had been out the game for a while at this point. Perhaps a case of if it aint broke? Oh, and I should say that I do quite dig his proto-Kanye get up, especially those boxfresh Force Ones at 0.25 seconds.
Wednesday, 4 February 2009
The Thick Of It
I finished Armando Ianucci's brilliant political satire 'The Thick Of It' on Monday - I know, how cutting edge am I, it came out in 2005! - in expectation of the Sundance smash, 'In The Loop'. Having missed it on BBC4, the first thing that sprang to mind when approaching it was Chris Langham's imprisonment for possession of indecent images of children. Its odd, because watching it now, four years after it first screened, one struggles to rid this unsavory fact from one's mind. Langham's performance as the essentially well-meaning, but totally inept Minister, Hugh Abbot is really really good. You may ask yourself how Abbot managed to get so deep into the corridors of power, but you can't help but be complicit in his befuddlement at what exactly one is supposed to do once there. What strikes you however, is that this seems to be a bizarre case of art almost mirroring life. Hugh Abbot fits the demographic perfectly for a paedophile, and in a macabre twist, only evident if you are watching the show 4 years too late like myself, it seems that the part has been written retrospectively for Langham - ie. Ianucci knew about his predilection for little kids and has encrypted hidden messages into the show that point towards this unpleasant truth. The use of 'nonce' abounds, and was it just me, or was Abbot's concern for Glenn Cullen's special needs son (especially when coupled with his essentially uncomic spin - "Inclusion is not illusion") bordering on the insipid? Or what about when he writes to glenncullen@hotmail.com, a special needs child named after Glenn Close, calling her a cunt?
It's a shame really because Langham was superb. As was the rest of the cast. Peter Capaldi (why are there so many Glaswegian Iti's - Capaldi, Ianucci, Federico from Big Brother 4?) will of course get the most plaudits for his rambunctious performance as a thinly-veiled Lord Mandelson - although I thought he was truly amazing as Charles I in 'The Devil's Whore' - but I also thought Chris Addison was great as Ollie Reeder, Abbot's equally inept Junior Advisor.
The show does at times feel like 'The Office' meets 'Yes Minister', thanks to the use of shaky hand-held camera to give that fly on the wall feel, but I felt the acting more than made up for accusations of being derivative. I'm sure politics works nothing like it appears to work on this show, but the show is successful in at least making us believe that is a passable approximation to it, closer to the reality than one would hope for. Likewise, for a programme that the makers claim is 80% scripted and 20 % improvised, there sure are a lot of quotable lines. Unfortunately I can't think of a single one right now, so maybe that's bullshit.
However, my favourite thing about the show is something Ianucci mentions in an interview with Uncut:
UNCUT:' Could you tell me about your "swearing consultant"?'
IANUCCI: 'That's not his only job, but he's sort of become that. He's a guy called Ian Martin. It's become traditional that when we've sort of finalised the script, which he contributes to anyway, I send it to him in Lancaster and he sends it back and it's got all this baroque swearing in it. "Hurricane of piss" and all that - that's Ian, so he's become known as our swearing consultant.'
I tell you, I want that fucking job so fucking much...
Tuesday, 3 February 2009
Young Folks Pussy
Maybe it makes me the world's biggest knob, but I actually quite enjoyed Peter, Bjorn and John's 'Young Folks'. There was something quite basic and catchy about the whistling, which somehow made up for the otherwise bum out coffee-table ambience. Another love of mine is songs with highly explicit lyrics about fornicating, especially when mooted by hot'n'sweaty ghetto trollops. No surprise I love this:
And this.
Oh, and this.
And definitely this.
That's why this new Diplo tune tickles me. It's as if that coffee-table mentioned above was strewn with mountains of coke, a couple of well-worn sex toys, a quart of Spanish Fly, and all 3 different types of Alizé. I'm sure you will agree, quite a party.
And this.
Oh, and this.
And definitely this.
That's why this new Diplo tune tickles me. It's as if that coffee-table mentioned above was strewn with mountains of coke, a couple of well-worn sex toys, a quart of Spanish Fly, and all 3 different types of Alizé. I'm sure you will agree, quite a party.
Transfer Deadline Day
Given the fact that most of the South East looked like downtown Vladivostok yesterday, the people over at Sky Sports News couldn't have been happier. With most people calling their bosses at work to tell them there was no possible way they could make it in, this special day in the British footballing calendar received far healthier viewing figures than it normally would, especially as SSN is readily available to those with a Freeview box.
I love transfer deadline day. For me it usually begins by logging onto The Guardian's Minute-By-Minute update, as I feel it has better writing than the BBC's 606 blog - just check out some of the old Rumour Mill archives if you don't believe me. From here, it basically boils down to clicking refresh on my Firefox window every couple of minutes, and watching the wildly imaginative, unbelievable, and even farcical rumours roll in. "Kaka spotted in the Craven Cottage carpark" texts Steve in Parsons Green, "belle du jour Luke Chadwick spotted shaking hands with David Gill at Carrington complex" from mANu4eVa; you get the picture.
This year however, what with 'being snowed in', I had the pleasure of spending the afternoon with the Sky Sports News team (including ex-Blue Peter presenter Simon Thomas).
The real star of the show though, is not our boy Simon, but instead, ANDY BURTON. I can't get a photo of this dude anywhere on the internet, but let me tell you - he is amazing. The first thing you will notice (and he first grabbed my attention at the end of the Summer Transfer Deadline Day - you remember, Dimi shaking hands with Sir Alex, and Robinho heading to Man City at the last minute, and claiming in a press conference he was very happy to be signing for Chelsea!) is that he has about three or four Blackberries on the go at once. Actually I lie. He has a couple of Blackberries and then a normal phone. It is from the normal phone that he receives personal calls, LIVE ON AIR, from his bevvy of in-the-know insiders - agents, facilitators, and other purveyors of fine bungs. His face lights up each time he receives a new text, allegedly from someone super important, and he literally gurgles with excitement. If he wasn't quite so charming, he would probably be the most annoying person in the world. But anyway, thanks a lot Sky Sports News. I thought you did a great job yesterday as at the end of last summer, and with Andy Burton, I think you made the signing of the season.
PS. You might want to know, our boy Andy (who used to present a show with Andy Goldstein (pictured above) - fuck me that's a heavyweight pairing) has become a bit of an internet sensation, and his Wikipedia page was vandalised yesterday. Shame on you faceless cowards.
I love transfer deadline day. For me it usually begins by logging onto The Guardian's Minute-By-Minute update, as I feel it has better writing than the BBC's 606 blog - just check out some of the old Rumour Mill archives if you don't believe me. From here, it basically boils down to clicking refresh on my Firefox window every couple of minutes, and watching the wildly imaginative, unbelievable, and even farcical rumours roll in. "Kaka spotted in the Craven Cottage carpark" texts Steve in Parsons Green, "belle du jour Luke Chadwick spotted shaking hands with David Gill at Carrington complex" from mANu4eVa; you get the picture.
This year however, what with 'being snowed in', I had the pleasure of spending the afternoon with the Sky Sports News team (including ex-Blue Peter presenter Simon Thomas).
The real star of the show though, is not our boy Simon, but instead, ANDY BURTON. I can't get a photo of this dude anywhere on the internet, but let me tell you - he is amazing. The first thing you will notice (and he first grabbed my attention at the end of the Summer Transfer Deadline Day - you remember, Dimi shaking hands with Sir Alex, and Robinho heading to Man City at the last minute, and claiming in a press conference he was very happy to be signing for Chelsea!) is that he has about three or four Blackberries on the go at once. Actually I lie. He has a couple of Blackberries and then a normal phone. It is from the normal phone that he receives personal calls, LIVE ON AIR, from his bevvy of in-the-know insiders - agents, facilitators, and other purveyors of fine bungs. His face lights up each time he receives a new text, allegedly from someone super important, and he literally gurgles with excitement. If he wasn't quite so charming, he would probably be the most annoying person in the world. But anyway, thanks a lot Sky Sports News. I thought you did a great job yesterday as at the end of last summer, and with Andy Burton, I think you made the signing of the season.
PS. You might want to know, our boy Andy (who used to present a show with Andy Goldstein (pictured above) - fuck me that's a heavyweight pairing) has become a bit of an internet sensation, and his Wikipedia page was vandalised yesterday. Shame on you faceless cowards.
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